This poem is excerpted from Embers & Amber, a collection of poetry by Candice Landau that explores love, loss, memory, and becoming. Note: some spacing has been stripped due to WordPress formatting issues.
Struggling For Peace
I want to take you
Like a crocodile
And drag you
Down with me
And drown you
In my world
And slice you
Open at the heart
And watch you
Bleed out
And cry
Dying
From the inside out.
And when there’s
No more life in you
I will feel ecstasy
And despair.
I will digest you
Bit by bit
Gulping back
The metal taste
Swallowing whole
Everything you
Wouldn’t give
Freely.
I will turn you
Into a thing
I have never known
And let your remains
Float to the surface.
And when the midday sun
Looks down on you
And I look up
At what is left
You will be
Beautiful.
I will be at peace
In the stillness
You can’t disrupt
And the water will sparkle
And wash away
The roots coiling
From you to me.
Finally I will swim away
Along the river bottom.
